Outside looking in

I just got some good news from my mom. It seems as though my little sister Robin has scored an awesome job. I am SO happy for her. It's funny, I remember when she and I were teenagers. We used to fight ALL the time about stupid stuff. We have shared a room off and on since we were kids. In high school she and I shared clothes. When I moved back home after being released from the Coast Guard she and I got close and hung out all the time. She was upset when I got married and moved away. It makes me sad when I think about it. I feel like I ambandoned my family in California. I wasn't there when my little brother and sister got their drivers licenses... or when they started college. I will be there when they get married... but will I be there when they have their first child... how often will I get to see their children? Will they know who I am when I come to visit?

I remember when my husband was in the Coast Guard and we had just gotten married. He had to go away to "A" school for five months. I lived with his parents while he was gone. I got to see my first niece all the time. When Tony finished school, I moved back to Alabama. The next time I saw my niece she didn't remember me... it really hurt. I don't want it to be like that with my brother and sister's kids.